lost at sea.

I dont know if it has ever been clear or not, but my titles to posts are generally song titles. this one is eisley from 5 years ago and for me provides happy memories of going to memphis in may with sare, bek, and cody.

i just got back from a really long cruise. and it is very clear to me, that cruises are trashy and not my thing. i was raised very differently. i think it would have been really nice though, if jake had been there. it would have been kinda beautiful, being in a new country every day with him. somehow though (i say it like that, eventhough it isnt a mystery at all why) i never felt like the picture below: breezy, sophisticated, and effervescent. the cruise was never my first second or millionth choice, but when its your senior year and your friends have already paid their deposit and the rest of your friends dont have springbreak for another two weeks, what are you going to do?

i was always waiting on people i wasnt interested in waiting on. and i couldnt get away. i couldnt call my boyfriend. i wanted to just lie there in the sun, read a book, and drink margaritas with my mom, but it wasnt like that at all. it was alot more effort and patience than i originally planned on expending. kind of sad. which is why, instead of posting pictures from my trip, i posted pictures of what i wished it would be.

in other news, which means, gossip girl news: im so glad its back. and the sentiment "finally" fits for serena and nate---yay. on the other hand though, i am persistently confused by chucks pajamas. I know every girl in the US would prefer a shirtless ed westwick over a black and gold silkishnighty ensembled chuck.

its creepy.

im so happy to be back, feeling like myself, blogging on a broken computer, watching cable, living by myself, being with my boyfriend, and experiencing my love for reading a new book, without the shared sensation of wanting to vom all over my lap. its also fantastic to be reunited with hairdryers that are for-real and not posing-air-blowerthings that look like illegal (and likely ineffective) medical instruments.

images via lateafternoon and previous sources